Photo by George Hodan
The last couple of days I’ve been dealing with a small flare
up. I’ve noticed that changes in the weather often bring on flare ups and we’ve
certainly been having some weather ups and downs lately. A flare up can make it
quite difficult for me to move easily and it also drains the energy right out
of me. On a day to day basis, I’d say that living with pain on the scale of 6
or 7 is normal for me. During a flare up the pain escalates up to an easy 8, depending
on the severity of the flare up. I’ve experienced pain in the 10 range where I’m
completely unable to stand, walk, or simply turn over in bed without crying.
Luckily, flare ups on that scale have become much less common since I was diagnosed
with the Ankylosing Spondylitis and began receiving treatment for it. Days like
today basically leave me hunched over and unable to stand up beyond a 30 degree
angle. I feel some pretty intense pain where my spine meets my pelvis, and my
legs and hips tend to ache badly. Every step or move that I make is painful
enough to be a constant reminder of my condition and that one day I’ll be that
old woman that is always bent over using her cane to help her along. What a
great picture I’ve just painted, huh? Seriously, though, that’s what I face on
a day to day basis. So how in the world can I stay optimistic?
Here’s the short answer. I look at the world around me and
understand that my issues pale in comparison to the things that other people in
this world have to deal with. Honestly, it amazes me how the human animal has,
and continues to, overcome some of the most horrific trials. I may have a rough
time but let’s put things in perspective. I have a home to live in. I’m not
starving. I have clothes on my back. I’m able to enjoy the love of my family. I’m
educated and I have opportunities that give me a chance to improve the
conditions of my life. In comparison to the majority of human beings I’m ahead
of the curve.
The other night I was watching an episode of “Chopped” and
one of the contestants was a woman who emigrated from the Republic of Georgia.
She lived through two wars and lost both friends and family. Now, here she is
making a life for herself, pushing onward and overcoming the struggles that she
had been handed. BTW - she ended up winning. As I watched this show and
listened to her I couldn’t help but to think how lucky I am to have never experienced
such difficulties. Her ability to persevere gives me hope, it reminds me that
things could always be worse. Out there in this big wide world are people who
are struggling daily to stay alive, my inability to stand up straight seems a
pretty small order in the bigger picture.
I think that if each of us can put things into such a
perspective then we give ourselves a fighting chance in this world. Sure, I
have other struggles too, but I only need to deal with one at a time and when I
put each individual event in this perspective it doesn’t seem so overwhelming.
I feel like I can deal with it and that life, as I know it, is pretty darn good
considering. Stay positive, keep a smile on your face, and let the love that
flows be itself. *hugs*
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